Fat in Indiana

How I spoent my Saturday

2012-01-30T14:16:00.003-05:00

You have to watch a commercial, then you can get a sense of the Indy Superbowl Zipline

Human Magnets Are We

2012-01-30T08:58:00.000-05:00

It is funny how two people with so little in common can find a life together. My wife and I are like that. We don't like the same music or food. Her idea of a good time is an afternoon at the mall. She would would be happy to never go to a museum or discuss history. If she sees a big crowd she heads straight toward it to be part of the action, while I head straight the opposite way. Yet somehow we have been together more than 34 years as a couple (almost 28 married)

Saturday she decided we were heading to downtown Indianapolis to check out the festivities surrounding the upcoming Superbowl. The whole time we were getting ready to go I imagined the crowds, the pain of street closures, the reported difficulty in finding suitable parking. It was windy and cold. I was fully prepared to be miserable.

There was little traffic. We found a great place right under Circle Center Mall -- right in the heart of downtown. The crowds were terrible, so I do have that to hang on to. We checked out the NFL painted IndyCars, the giant Roman Superbowl numerals. We mingled with the crowds. The primary attraction for the wife was the Zipline. Billed as the longest temporary Zipline in the United States it towers 100 feet above Capitol Ave in the heart of the Superbowl Village. You can se pictures here. The presale tickets were long ago sold out, but there was a chance you could buy tickets at the gate.

I could bore you with long details, but we finally got a chance to Zip around 8:30 in the evening. Here is a shot of the happy couple just seconds before we stepped off into space with nothing but a far distant ground below our feet:

That is my I hate heights and am about to die face*.

The Zipline was a blast. The cold was not so bad and we survived the crowds. In all we had a a good Saturday. But I am still tired of hearing about the damn Superbowl and I am ready for it to go away.

Just one note to the city of Indianapolis. temporarily renaming the downtown streets after NFL teams is a horrible, awful idea.

* Iam not sure what is up with the weird double chin thing I have going on. I am sure the wife is smiling because she is with me. Yes, that is it.

I need a little help here

2012-01-29T09:24:00.002-05:00

Do any of you know where the wife stashed the box her little Nikon came in? The charging cord for the rechargeable battery and for transferring pics to the 'puter were in that box. She put it in a place she would know right where it was when she needed it. Now she has no clue.

Help a brother out will ya?

Ruminations

2012-01-28T08:11:00.004-05:00

Sometimes life is weird. I met up with a couple of old colleagues this week. One I met for lunch, the other on the phone. I worked with these guys back in my first real professional job. We were all on the same sales team, a small very effective bunch of guys who knew their shit. I was the customer service manage that dealt with these two outside guys (there were actually six of us total) and they convinced management I should be an outside guy too. I guess these men can be responsible or to blame for who I am today, professionally.

I have not spoken to either of these guys for a long time. One guy I have not been in contact since 1996 or 1997. It was good to relive old times and old stories. The company we worked for was sold and split up, we all went our separate ways.

There is a dusting of snow on the ground this morning. Only the grass is covered. The wind is blowing and the coffee is hot. As often seems the case the magic iPod knows exactly the music to play on this quiet Saturday morning. While reading the news and catching up on your blogs I heard The Judds, Bob Marley, a little mellow Neil Young and one of my favorite Sinatra tunes.

Have a great weekend.

Dear President Obama,

2012-01-27T07:51:00.001-05:00

I have a situation that will anger you even more than the inequity of taxes paid by Billionaire Warren Buffett and his secretary. Your "That's Unfair" meter will peg full on to "outraged".

My son will pay an effective marginal tax rate of 15%. He is a line cook at a local Italian eatery. He works part time. I will pay a 6% tax rate, even though I am an extraordinary widget salesman and I will make significantly more income than my son this year. Do you call that fair?

Of course I am comparing my son's federal income tax rate and my local sales tax rate. But hey, we do not want to confuse the electorate do we? Buffett pays a different rate on his investments than his hardworking secretary does on her income. I understand, it is the message not the facts, Barrack my man. I get it, you are all about the class warfare this election aren't you? I follow your logic Mr. President. You have to capitalize on the misery and hard feelings your economy has spawned. You cannot very well run on your record, I suppose. As blamer-in-chief this fits well with what you do best; blame someone else.

This election you will blame the more successful in life. Your massive increases in spending cannot be responsible for the large deficits, the rich just are not paying enough. Hey, how about we confiscate all of the wealth of all of the people making ten million or more? What, it will not make a dent in the deficit? What? The richest 50% pay ALL of the taxes? The richest 10% pay 50% of the taxes? I guess we have to redefine "fair".

Mr. Obama there is one point upon which we do agree. It is shameful Warren B's secretary pays a 35% tax rate. Add in local and state taxes and that hard working woman is giving more than one half of her wages to government. In the olden days that was called indentured servitude. The old company store worked on a similar principle. The Government has plenty of money fueling the coffers. It is the spending that is the problem. It is time to wean the Government off my paycheck. Like I said, let us not let actual facts get in the way of a good campaign.

Because we're here, lad. Nobody else. Just us.

2012-01-26T06:44:00.000-05:00

Alphonse-Marie-Adolphe de Neuville (1835–1885)

I am not sure how it escaped me. I guess I am getting forgetful in my old age. I seriously thought the anniversary was January 29th. But last Sunday, January 22, marked the 133rd anniversary of the Defense of Rorke's Drift and the Battle of Isandlwana. Eleven Victoria Crosses for heroism were given out in the former, and the latter marks one of the worst defeats in British Military history.

At Rorke's Drift less than 150 British soldiers defended a small mission station and hospital against an estimated 4,000 Zulu warriors through the evening and night. You can read a rather good description of the battle here

If you want to read what I consider one of the finest books on the Zulu Wars, I recommend The Washing of the Spears by Donald Morris. I have read my copy at least twice, parts of it multiple times.

Of course action movie lovers will know the movies Zulu Dawn, and Zulu. While both take some liberties with historical accuracy, they are great fun. I give them each a huge thumbs up. In fact, I plan to watch both before the week is over. What? You have not seen Zulu? Here is a teaser:

Yeah, the whole movie is like that. Catch it on Netflix, or at your favorite video store or streaming service. Trust me, you will glad you did.

'Splain this Lucy

2012-01-25T06:02:00.000-05:00

The Republicans in charge tell me the best candidate is the guy who lost to the guy who was trounced by Obama last time.

My other choice is a big government insider named Newt.

Yuck.

But even the guy who pushes carts out at my local WalMart would be better than the guy currently playing golf while living in the White House.

If I can't do it in three years...

2012-01-24T12:41:00.000-05:00

State of the Union Preview

2012-01-24T07:32:00.001-05:00

I have obtained an unedited copy of The Obama's rehearsal for his upcoming State of the Union Address this evening*:

Remember the main themes:

-Tax the rich

-Spend more, except the military. We have to eliminate the military.

-Create jobs, unless it involves oil or gas or coal or actually building something like a pipeline What he means is to create Government jobs.

-Help the middle class, except when making their energy bills skyrocket.

--Remember America is great, so we have to change everything about it.

--Mostly tax the rich

Read this

h/t PRS

* yes, I know I have done this before, but the song really does sum up the Obama position perfectly.

I have answers

2012-01-23T09:34:00.003-05:00

Want to know why those folks who are citizens of the World but not of the US are clamoring to get here? Looking for answers of why a person would risk life and limb to wade the Rio Grande, dodge the hated Border Patrol, and risk dying in the deserts of the American Southwest?

Curious as to why the vast majority of the Third World hates us? Concerned about the roots of Muslim anger against "The Great Satan"?

It is not our blue jeans, our music, our movies or our decadent culture. The love/hate attitude of the world is not our wealth, our lifestyle, or our big gas eating automobiles. Global envy is simple to surmise. It can be summed by three things we have and they want: Gravy, Bacon, Corn Bread.

The Northeastern media elites hate the citizens of flyover country not for our bitter clinging love of guns and religion, but rather the wholesome goodness of a pan of white gravy., the smoky wholesomeness of our bacon and the pure greatness of homemade cornbread. The Anthony Bourdains of the world look down on Paula Deene and her butter/fried culinary inspirations, but you and I know they just have bacon envy.

I fried up some chicken last night, mashed some spuds and baked some biscuits. I topped it all with a delicious batch of white gravy and I knew I was living the High Life.

Sucks to be you world.

Ice

2012-01-21T07:14:00.000-05:00

A Haiku for Jean:

ICE

Needed for cocktails
Perfect for skates and hockey
On streets, not so great

It also makes walking down the drive to fetch the paper at O'dark thirty a bit hazardous. My Nike's do not have ice treads. I should have put on my golf shoes. I will take snow any day over ice.

Blame Obama

2012-01-20T15:11:00.002-05:00

When gas hits $4.00 or more per gallon, blame Obama.

When we continue to depend on foreign regimes who are not our friends for oil imports, blame Obama.

When terrorists take money we spend on Mideast oil and use it to build bombs and weapons to be used against us, blame Obama.

When companies fail to provide new shovel-ready jobs, blame Obama.

When unemployment continues to hover at high levels, blame Obama.

When Union jobs are lost, blame Obama.

When the Chinese are finding steady sources of oil right in our backyard, blame Obama.

When allies like Canada turn their back on us politically and economically, blame Obama.

When you read that the Keystone XL Pipeline has been stopped dead in its tracks, blame Obama.

When you scratch your head and wonder how a decision can be so poor that the Obama-fanboys at the Washington Post thinks it is bad, blame Obama.

Read this

Read this

Super sick of it

2012-01-20T07:12:00.001-05:00

I love the NFL.

I am utterly, completely, totally sick of hearing about the Superbowl in Indianapolis. The next few weeks cannot come and go fast enough.

Dear NFLPA

2012-01-19T10:25:00.001-05:00

Really? The NFL Players Association wants join in the union protests over Right to Work legislation in Indiana. This legislation would make it illegal to force a person to pay union dues as a condition of employment. It would not stop unions from collective bargaining for wages and benefits. It would not prevent anyone from joining a union or organizing any workplace.

The NFLPA is so gung ho on union membership it actually DISBANDED as a union about a year ago. That is right, the NFLPA decertified the union allowing each member to individually bargain and negotiate wages, etc. You might remember Brady et. al and their law suit against the NFL? I guess the NFLPA is OK with their members opting out, but they insist the poor UAW schmuck making a decimal point of the wages the average special teamer earns must pay into the union no matter what.

I guess those football players did not study the definition of irony in English class.

The taxpayers of Indiana are being robbed.

2012-01-18T14:51:00.000-05:00

Refuses to work, still takes the pay

I see the crybaby Democrats are continuing to refuse to come into session in the Indiana House. They cannot defeat legislation they do not like so in true fleebagger fashion the Indiana democrats refuse to participate.

Democrats say they want a referendum on the RTW bill. Well except it is unconstitutional. But let us not let facts get in the way. Dear Democrats -- want a referendum? The true referendum will be at the ballot box. If the Democrats are right and the People of the State do not like the law, then they will vote out the Republican majority and the new leadership can bring back unioncentric policies. It is really that simple. In the meantime, show up and vote.

Democrat lawmakers who refuse to do the work they were elected to do are stealing from the people of Indiana. Just as any employee who takes the pay and refuses to work, they should be fired. A vendor for the State who took payment and did not deliver the contracted goods and services would be guilty of fraud and theft. Representatives who refuse to show up and vote, who refuse to do the work of the people, are frauds and thieves. Last year this same group of Democrats took the pay of a Legislator and then fled to Illinois to sit in the hot tubs and bars of Champaign. Now they are stealing from us again.

This is not about good or bad legislation. That is a different argument. This is about the failure to live up to the oath of office, about taking from the People of Indiana without conscious.

You should each be ashamed.

Today's Earworm

2012-01-18T06:39:00.000-05:00

Doom dada doom dada doom...I dig it that boots are back in style.

I like the original better, but Simpson is hotter.

Here is Miley Cyrus taking a stab at it:

How about a dance version with a hot brunette?:

Here is Siouxie without the Banshees:

This tune seems to be a favorite of punk bands the world over. You know where to find other versions.

Voter ID

2012-01-17T10:09:00.001-05:00

Seriously, is there any true arguments against voter ID laws? Why is it unreasonable to expect one to prove his identity to vote when you have to prove you are you to cash a check, buy beer, get unemployment or welfare? You have to have proof of ID to board a plane. The franchise is among the most precious of our freedoms, and any measure that protects that Right is worthwhile in my view.

As long as the State offers free identification cards, it is a stretch to find a person who is really inconvenienced by having to show an ID to vote. Unless you hail from Chicago or the numerous Democratic strongholds where even the dead routinely vote (early and often), I cannot see it as a problem.

I would be happy to see arguments against Voter ID in the comments.

I think our feckless Attorney General is tilting at windmills on this one. Perhaps he should focus on Voter Intimidation at the polls instead of promoting potential voter fraud. maybe he should look into the massive voter fraud perpetuated every election by Acorn? Methinks he doth protest too much.

I'll be damned

2012-01-17T06:09:00.000-05:00

I just figured out yesterday's Federal Holiday had nothing to do with MILK, but rather it celebrated Martin Luther King -- MLK.

This is how your lose a Republic

2012-01-16T10:34:00.000-05:00

In the last decades of the Roman Republic the Senators discovered it was just easier to let a strong executive run things than it was to actually govern. Political power was far more important than rule of law.

In a similar fashion, Harry Reid is willing to ignore Constitutionally mandated Senate responsibilities to ensure his party gets the power it craves. Reid is willing to give up long-term checks and balances for a short-term victory for his President. His hypocrisy is sickening and his sudden reversal in position should worry Americans of every political stripe.

Rest assured Obama's abuse of the recess appointment provisions of the Constitution will be repeated by future Presidents. Some who will not be liberal Democrats. The Harry Reids and everyday liberal bloggers who pretend this is no big deal will rue the day.

Without a trace of hyperbole, I believe there is no doubt we are witnessing the slow decay of the Republic. How far are from that one Big Crisis and a recommendation we suspend Congress so the President can manage the problem without Congressional and political infighting. Reasonable people will agree that is the best path. And then there will be the next crises and another and soon we will have a permanent Caesar ruling the nation. We are not there yet. But the continuous strengthening of the Executive Branch has gone on for a while now. Congress has given away the legislative power to various agencies and even the courts.

Think it cannot happen? Open any history book at random and read. The timeline of history is replete with examples of Caesars, kings, emperors and dictators. The list of successful Republics is short.

The Hoosierboy Code

2012-01-16T08:12:00.002-05:00

i did not post anything yesterday in a rare example of self control. It is not complicated, I had nothing to say.

I know what you are mumbling under your breath, "So, it never stopped him in the past". Maybe. you are right, but I prefer to believe any nugget of truth that travels from my fingertips to your monitor or screen is worth reading. Someday there will be entire religions dedicated to my every word, deed and thought. Or Not. Only time will tell and none of you will be around to see it. Who made you the next Nostradamus anyway?

And the marching band refused to yield

2012-01-14T09:05:00.000-05:00

I am late in surfing the interwebz waves this chilly Saturday. I sorta slept in. The boy had a school thing very early, so I got up a little before five in the aye em to get him moving -- and stayed up until he left to keep him on schedule. As usual, he did not require any vocal cattle prodding, he is a responsible young man. After he left I went back to bed and slept until just before 8:00.

After a perusal of the paper, breakfast, and coffee, here I am bloggifying my boring life while Don McLean sings about pie and rye and levies and nonsense in the background.

It has been an exciting week in my little town. We have had killers caught, shooters shot and there is a dick-waver on the loose. I am not surprised our newsworthy pervert failed to make n appearance Friday morning to point his tiny dick at unsuspecting school girls. Wind chills were below zero and a shriveled blue tally-whacker titillates no one. I can picture it. Shivering in the cold, our fearless flasher throws open his raincoat to a huddled group of elementary kids waiting at the bus stop.

"Look at that idiot", says Tina. "Hey Mister, aren't you cold? Where are your pants?"

Is that a Smurf hanging between your legs?" inquires Emily.

"Look, Dude's got no balls" laughs Mark.

I presume flashers are not looking for ridicule. I think we will not see the our man again until warm weather returns.

Triskaidekaphobia

2012-01-13T10:42:00.000-05:00

January has finally arrived here at the old homestead. Blowing snow - albeit not a lot of it -- along with a strong west wind is giving us temperatures in the teens and below zero wind chills. It is hard to complain about our weather up to now in this New Year. It has been mild and virtually snow free.

Now winter is here. At least for a few days.

Mr. Sandman, send me a dream......

2012-01-13T06:12:00.000-05:00

I was at a party, a reunion of sorts. All kinds of people from my past were there. I was only a little surprised to see Ernie standing next his wife. who was talking to my buddy Daryl. I headed that way. It was good to see Ernie, and even better to talk to him. He has been dead for 25 years. He looked good. Daryl and Elaine were deep into their own conversation.

I asked Ernie what he was up to, and he said mostly looking out for Elaine. He asked after my wife and if I had kids.

I told Ernie my brother would be so excited to see him. I asked if I could call Otter and have him come over. Ernie cocked his head and looked at me inquisitively. Ernie's eyes narrowed and he frowned for a mere second. "Have you ever seen that Bruce Willis movie?" he asked, "the one with the kid?"

"I see dead people" I moaned...

Obama as a Failure

2012-01-12T11:56:00.000-05:00

From an objective viewpoint The Obama is an all-around failure as a President. The reasons a Conservative is angry and disappointed are numerous. The big government liberal economic policies, record spending, and endless class warfare rhetoric makes Obama the prototypical tax and spend Democrat. His policies have brought the first financial downgrade to our Governmental bond rating. Obama and company have increased our debt more than all previous Presidents combined.

The President's foreign policy blunders, his courting of Muslim extremists, bowing to foreign potentates, gifting iPods and all around apologizing for any and everything are an anathema to any died in the wool Reaganite.

Obama's continuation of the hated Bush's War on Terror policies must make the progressive liberal leftist socialist Democrat white with rage. The Code Pinkers and Cindy She-hags of the world must suffer blood pressure levels bordering on stroke-inducing. Yet somehow their bitter anger is not enough to protest the White House and camp out near The Bamster's homestead. We have not seen the Code Pinker's saggy tatas waving free in the wind cooling their wrinkled cooters in the sun as they protest the various wars in far off lands. Where were the chants of "blood for oil" as Obama opened new war in Libya and continued in Iraq and Afghanistan?

We have not seen the comparisons to Hitler, yet Gitmo operates as before. The TSA, Homeland Security and Patriot Act restrictions are stronger than ever. All of the actions the left hated most about 'The Shrub' continue unabated under Obama, yet we do not see the same level of protest, anger, old lady nudity.

Is it that the actions are more tolerable if the man in charge has a (D) after his name? Is it that the biased press does not report the anger?

Mostly we have a President who would rather play golf and campaign than govern. He pouts when he cannot get his way. He is petulant and lacks the ability to compromise. Obama is like the little kid who learns to dog paddle and thinks that qualifies him to jump from the high dive. The end result finds him in way over his head in deep water, no water wings to be found.

Four more years? I am not sure we can stand four more months.

Back in the saddle again

2012-01-12T08:50:00.001-05:00

Its been lonely in the saddle since my horse died...

Anyway, my attempts to post via my Kindle Fire did not work so well. I think it is more an issue of operator error than technology or hotel internet. I could get the text into the box, but I was not able to edit the content or the spelling -- and I need to edit the spelling, trust me. This is especially true on the little electric keyboard with my stubby fingers. Fs came out as Ds and Hs as Us. It was as if the proverbial monkeys were typing away at the proverbial typewriters, but well before Shakespeare was produced..Hrer ois a nexanmlpe.

My first swing through the northern extremes of the Hoosier State was good in that it was January and there was no snow to be found. That is a good thing.

hola readers

2012-01-10T16:04:00.001-05:00

Interwebz connections are a bit spotty here in my sooper sekrit location. Talk among yourselves.

Is there even one ethical Democrat?

2012-01-09T10:50:00.001-05:00

Is there not one single Democrat willing to stand up and denounce Obama's recent unconstitutional power grab?

Has power and Party usurped all that is good and decent? Can no Democrat read or understand Article II, Section 2 of the Constitution?

Is there not a Federal Judge that will issue a restraining order?

A recent commenter wondered why I say Fuck You Democrats. Now you know. They have no ethics, no integrity, no sense of honor.

I challenge any liberal, progressive or Democrat to explain why this action is acceptable. Then tell me why you would have taken the same position had the President been named Bush.

Read this -- a more intelligent statement of the issue.

False Alarm

2012-01-09T08:36:00.001-05:00

My pseudo-cold symptoms have regressed. It could be I am a hypochondriac. Or..it could be the bug has taken on unheard of stealth capabilities, lying in wait to ambush me with symptoms so severe, so baffling to the medical profession Dr. House would throw up his arms in frustration.

He would then drop his cane and fall over, but that would be merely a funny distraction from my true misery.

Choose your own adventure...

I hope a car battery to the testicles is not next

2012-01-08T07:51:00.000-05:00

"They" --and you all know about the evil "They"-- have attacked me in my sleep. Like fanatic members of the Cult of Charlie Manson, "They" have entered my house in the dead of night and tortured me. Imagine my skull clamped tight in a vice while icepicks and small fillet knives are thrust into the soft tissue of my right eyeball. My body was beaten with the latest in composite material baseball bats, The slugger was skilled at his art of torture, knowing how to bruise and damage every muscle fiber, yet not break the bones, leaving me at a level of pain just short of passing out. Albert Pujols could not have handled his Louisville Slugger with more effect. Through the blur of pain I was punched in the guts repeatedly by a wavering image with the skill and strength of Mike Tyson.

That is what has happened to me.

Or maybe I am just getting a cold. I popped a couple of Advil in any case.

I get up, I get down

2012-01-07T08:29:00.001-05:00

I did not post political stuff for about a month. Iguess I have made up for it the past few days. Every top of the hour news story, every glance at the home page, everywhere I turned the past few days I see the abuse of Big Government and my blood pressure climbs...

But it is Saturday, the coffee is hot and black, the tunes on th iPod are first rate and I am in a good mood.

The wife had some things to return to the mall last night so we ventured to the big city. The mall eventually closed and she headed toward one of the Big Department stores that was staying open late for a sale or something. I went to the car. I drove around to the outside entrance of the Big Department store and fired up my iPod on the bluetooth audio system.

After a while she came out and I left my music on. Now the wife is a pop music kind of girl. If she is going to listen to what she calls "oldies" it is going to be hard rock. Me? -- if you have read here long you know my tastes are a bit eclectic. To be an ass, I decided to make her listen to my music all the way home. I skipped a few I knew she would hate, and even a couple she would not mind. Finally just the right song came on.

Yes is an squired taste and the song "Close to the Edge" even more so. The disjointed notes and weird time signature of the beginning prompted her to mumble "It sounds like they are all playing a different song". This was a live version, so the track comes it something over 18 minutes. She made it about 12 minutes before she said finally told me "This song really sucks". I just laughed and said I was waiting to see how long she could take it. I shuffled to the next tune and some Rolling Stones filled the air. We were almost home at that point anyway.

The point of this post? It is possible that you, Dear Reader, may picture me as this sweet humble lovable teddy bear. In your mind's eye I am a caring, considerate, polite citizen of the world.You see me as a model spouse, quick with a joke and helping hand.

In reality I am kind of an ass, sarcastic and bitter. I am prone to childish acts of revenge and cling to petty anger for way too long. Sorry to burst your bubble.

Please, Please stage a strike at the Superbowl

2012-01-06T12:06:00.000-05:00

Screw you NFLPA. If Union membership is so very important why did the players DECERTIFY their own union to change their bargaining power? So I guess it is OK to NOT belong to a union if it suits your purposes? Give me a break.

Polls show a vast majority of Hoosiers favor the Right-to-Work legislation. Work stoppage and a strikes at the Superbowl will not bolster the Union cause, it will hurt it. Please, disrupt the Superbowl. Union popularity will drop even further.

chirp, chirp, chirp

2012-01-06T11:27:00.000-05:00

Liberals who were constantly up in arms and gnashing their teeth about George 'The Shrub' Bush trampling the Constitution. I am waiting for the hue and cry over The Obama's blatant unConstitutional power grab. You cannot make a 'recess appointment' when Congress is not in recess. The Founders put checks and balances upon the Executive branch for a reason. We don't need a fucking king or a dictator. Why is it the leftists who always force their will upon the People by dictate?

And if you believe that appointments to the NLRB are essential to job growth and improving the economy your are a stupid fuck. I am surprised you do not need written instructions reminding you to breath. This is a blatant power grab and nothing more.

read

read

Dear Democrats

2012-01-06T08:58:00.002-05:00

Can we all quit pretending you just admit The Democratic party the official political arm of the AFL/CIO, SEIU and the Teamsters?

After all, when the head of the Indiana AFL/CIO actually sits in caucus with you, there is really no more pretense is there?

If the "Occupiers" were truly angered about lobbyists and undue influence in politics they would be all over this. The head of the SEIU has spent almost as much time at the White House as The Obama has on the golf course. Almost. But the Occupy movement is more about destroying capitalism, isn't it?

Grow Up Democrats

2012-01-05T09:50:00.000-05:00

You remember their type from your childhood days. A bunch of kids are playing and little Patrick always had to be in charge. He had to be the Chief. If you were playing Monopoly he had to be the race car or he would not play. If the gang voted play Hide n Seek when he wanted to play Kick the Can, then he just went home. If you were in a middle of a sandlot game of baseball and called him out at first, he cried, stomped, pleaded and if he did not get his way he took his ball and went home, leaving you with your bat in hand. You know the type.

Those guys all grew up. Most of them banded together to join the Democrat Party. Their motto -- Its Not Fair! Once again Indiana Democrats led by the man with a snazzy hairpiece, Pat Bauer, have learned the hard way that elections have consequences. Using their full complement of fingers and toes they have counted and determined Democrats lack the votes to stop legislation they do not like.

Instead of being adults, they refuse to participate. Last year they hightailed it to Illinois. This year they are locked in their offices, crying, screaming in fits of rage "It is not fair", clutching their tattered worn baseballs tightly to their sunken hairless chests. The cause of their tantrum is pending Right to Work legislation. The measure says there are no longer closed union shops in Indiana. If an employee does not want to join a union or pay dues, he does not have to. Nothing stops devoted union members from belonging to the United Steel Workers, The UAW , The IBEW, The Teamsters or any other union. But no one has to either. Any workplace can still be organized. Wages, benefits, and work rules can be negotiated and bargained. But, as an employee, you do not want those benefits -- you do not have to pay union dues or belong to the Brotherhood. It seems reasonable to me.

The crybaby Democrats would have us believe the Right to Work legislation is unfair and unpopular with the voters of Indiana..Reasonable elected officials would vote their conscious and win or lose as the votes are tallied. If the new law really is unpopular, then it can be overturned in the next election and will serve as fodder for the upcoming campaign. If the people of the Hoosier State want to change things back they will pull the electronic lever in favor of the Democrat in the fall elections. Just as Obamacare ushered in a strong Republican majority in the US House of Representatives, Right to Work could bring about a strong Democrat victory in Indiana.

Except Hoosiers are in favor of Right to Work by an overwhelming majority. The Democrats know only the unions are against the measure -- who would pay union dues if they were not forced? The Democrats know they will not get a chance to overturn a popular law, so they return to their childhood, spoiled brat tendencies. The Democrats hide in their closet, refusing to play by the rules. They would rather stick a knife into their red rubber kickball. No one gets to play if they cannot make up the teams.

I despised those kids in my youth, and, my attitude has not changed in the interceding decades -- FUCK YOU Democrats.

Obama goes into full campaign mode, actual Governing is just too boring

2012-01-04T12:30:00.000-05:00

Seriously, have we EVER had a President with such a poor work ethic, and even worse leadership skills?

I suppose, you could argue it was Wilson during the last months of his Presidency. But Wilson had suffered a stroke.

Yeah, but...

2012-01-04T10:07:00.001-05:00

It is cold, but not too cold.

My nose is running, but I am not sick.

I am hungry, but I can wait until lunch.

The world may end in December, but since it is leap year we will get an extra day.

My wallet is empty, but tomorrow is pay day.

I got nuttin', but you still get a post.

Who the Hell put Iowa in charge?

2012-01-03T08:42:00.002-05:00

I am not going to lie to you. I look at the crop of candidates for President and I can at best generate a big yawn. That is not entirely accurate, my real reaction is more akin to "is that the best we can muster?" .

Perhaps instead of tearing each other down, the GOPers should be telling us how they are going to dismantle and impede the socialist/progressive/liberal track the current administration is determined to pursue. Maybe they should be outlining their vision to reign in the debt and Government in general.

I have resigned myself to the prospect of a RINO or worse occupying the White House. We must get true conservative leadership in the House and Senate. The GOP must garner a filibuster proof Senate majority. Only then it will not matter what the President wants.

To accomplish this task we must convince the DINOs to vote for a conservative candidate. What, you have not heard of DINOs? Like their Republican counterparts these guys are labeled Democrats but are actually conservatives in disguise. They are the Reagan or Blue Dog Democrats. Unlike RINOs, the DINOs keep on voting Democrat, even when they do not agree with the direction the Party is going. RINOs, on the other hand turn their back on fellow Repubs at every opportunity.

I have a good friend. He is a Postal Service Lifer; a union guy through and through. He has always voted for the Democrat, likely because his dad always voted Democrat, and his grandad before that. It is the mufti-generational Hoover/FDR effect. A quick conversation with my friend will tell you he hates government spending, thinks we need real welfare reform, is a big gun owner and hunter, thinks Obamacare will destroy the health system, likes a strong military, wants some real immigration reform and would rather eat dog turds than vote Republican. My friend will tell you Obama is a disaster, but better than a Republican. We don't argue politics. There is no point.

I guarantee you my friend Tony is not an exception to the rule. There are lots of Democrats like him. Many are union members, many work construction, the auto plants, the blue collar jobs that run the American economy. Like you and I , they go to the polls, hold their nose and vote for a guy they don't want.

Polls show an overwhelming majority of Americans are conservative. Our two-party system gets in the way of a better Government. The power brokers in both parties like it that way..

Easing into it

2012-01-02T09:40:00.001-05:00

My holiday break is over. I am back to work today. I last worked on December 20, I had vacation use-or0lose days, plus the company-paid holidays. My work muscles are squeaking like the Tin Man's knee joints. I kid. The phone has been silent all morning and only one new email has crossed my screen. Most of my customers are closed today. I have my December expenses to do today and my monthly report is due on Friday. I fully expect a slow morning followed by a slower afternoon.

We took down the Christmas tree last night. The house looks so bare and gloomy. If the weather cooperates I will get the lights down outside in the next day or two. Then we have the long gray cold days of January and February to survive. Spring is coming. Just not for a while.

2012-01-01T00:01:00.000-05:00

If you drink, don't drive

2011-12-31T07:37:00.004-05:00

I am not one to do a lot of year end reflecting. I might be an amateur historian, but the past is the past.

Despite the bombast, the sarcasm and the bluster you mostly find around here, I am really truly humbled that anyone takes time from their day to read my drivel. I thank each of you for your support.

I wish you happiness, good health, and success in the coming year.

If you are heading out to celebrate this evening, I will offer you the same advice I gave my kids as they left for college. Never, ever drink the punch at a party. Trust me on this.

Classic music

2011-12-30T08:11:00.003-05:00

How about some music for your entertainment today?

Just skip the ad at the beginning.

Your other choice is a detailed account of my ongoing bout of diarrhea this morning.

Christmas Again

2011-12-29T07:57:00.001-05:00

We went to my daughter's house for "Christmas" last night. She was at her husband's family this year over the actual Holiday. She made an unbelievable dinner for us. Braised short ribs were accompanied by roasted butternut squash, green beans and potatoes. My daughter is an excellent cook. She made a couple of apple pies for dessert along with a red velvet trifle. After stuffing ourselves silly for the third time in a week, we opened our gifts. After dinner the boys all retired to my son-in-law's man cave where we played some pool and watched some hockey on the big screen. The wife and daughter washed the dishes while all of the men played.

I can live with that.

Days and Weeks

2011-12-28T09:08:00.001-05:00

I did not make it to the cigar store yesterday. I spent the day reading and watching movies. Such is life.

It snowed all morning and much of the afternoon, with just an inch or so of accumulation, most of it is already melted.

I spent this morning filling in my new desk calendar. I have the birthdays and holidays scheduled, so I don't miss either. I would hate to work on a day I had off! Right now I am scheduled to attend the World's Most Boring Trade Show in February over President's Day. That is supposed to be a company holiday. I hope I do, then I can take the day later as a vacation day.

It is not you, it is me

2011-12-27T08:18:00.000-05:00

Well, to be honest, it is just that I have some new books to read. I would rather entertain myself than entertain you. I am selfish that way.

I am going to do my best to remain politics-free around here until after the New Year. That could be welcome news or not, depending on just what you are looking for at this old blog. I have no idea.

It is Tuesday and I have no plans, besides some heavy reading and maybe some movie watching. I might call my buddy, who is also off work all week, and see if he wants to head to the cigar bar this afternoon. We are supposed to get a little (and I mean LITTLE) snow, so we shall see.

Have a great day. Check back later. Who knows, I might find some inspiration that drives me back to the old laptop to create a pithy, well written post.

Yes, I know, I am laughing too. My side hurts...

Santa has a sore back today

2011-12-26T08:01:00.005-05:00

Good morning Blog World, I hope old Saint Nick was one half as kind to you as he was to me. The wife, as usual, went berserk. It was a gift giving frenzy on her part. I received a bunch of new stuff, some I needed some I didn't, but isn't that the point of a gift? The kids scored like they were six years old again. The only downer was my daughter and son-in-law went to his family in Chicago for the weekend. We will have a get-together with them later this week.

After we opened presents, I whipped up a bacon and eggs breakfast. After which I started in on preparing Christmas dinner. I made all of the boy's favorites to go with the traditional fare and the end result was a carbapalooza. Along with a succulent turkey I made noodles, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, rolls and mac and cheese. Oh, and candied yams, I forgot about them. I would rather eat fried dog turds than sweet potatoes of any variety, but the wife loves 'em. For dessert, we had a peach pie my mom made me and a collection of cookies and fudge and treats my daughter made and brought over before she headed north. All of this was in addition to eating enough to feed Nigeria on Christmas Eve as we attended two family gatherings!

My blood sugar meter laughed when I checked my blood this morning. I think the reading was "maple syrup". I am going to have to walk about ten miles a day this week to get things back into shape.

Have a great day.

Merry Christmas

2011-12-25T00:01:00.000-05:00

The Reason for the Season.

2011-12-24T00:01:00.000-05:00

Holy Toledo, what a football game

2011-12-23T07:58:00.002-05:00

How about them Colts? The Houston Texans continued a decade and franchise-long losing streak in Indianapolis last night. Aided by some key penalties that actually occurred and a few that never happened, the Colts led for 19 whole seconds to gain the second victory in the Dan Orlovsky era. Who needs Peyton Manning when Dan the Man is under center?

No, I was not at the game, so I do not get credit. BUT---my daughter and son-in-law were there, so it is more apparent than ever a member of my family needs to be the guest of honor at all future games.

Holy Toledo, who would have thought the Colts could win again? And more importantly, why do we say Holy Toledo? Why not Holy Rochester or Holy Evansville? Holy St. Marys has a more reverent sound if we have to use towns from northwest Ohio. I have been to Toledo and there is nothing Holy about it. Maybe Holy Toledo is a euphemism for Holy Hell? In that case wouldn't Holy Detroit be more fitting? Maybe Holy Gary? Those cities are both more representative of the nether regions than of Heaven.

Oh grow up, Detroit. Who makes a list of places they want to live and writes "Detroit" at the top in crisp black Sharpie? No one, that's who.

If you want your colloquialism to have a degree of alliteration wouldn't Holy Hoboken better fit the bill? Perhaps Holy Billings would be better. I always thought Billings would be a nice place, in the summer. Some might argue Holy Salt Lake City would be a better saying. I have been told Hawaii is Heavenly, so Holy Hawaii conjures images of an afterlife spent on spotless beaches. Plus it is another example of the double-H thingy. I do not think Holy Los Vegas is appropriate, other than I wager more prayers are uttered in Vegas than the Vatican City. See that, Dear Reader, how I mixed "wager" and "Vegas" into one snappy sentence?

After about 64 seconds of reflection, I think Holy Houston is the best phrase to use -- as in Holy Houston, you choked.

Perpetual Change

2011-12-22T08:01:00.000-05:00

I finished my shopping in almost record time. Friendly salespeople in the women's store will always recognize a lost soul with a list in hand. It is easy commission. In any case helping a customer find a specific item beats folding the same shirt on the front table for ninth time that hour.My patent 'awe shucks' and 'please help me' attitude never fails.

My approach to my work as a salesman is a related cousin to my Christmas shopping plan. In my dealing with my customers I am just an ordinary guy trying to make a living. There is no trace of the used car/insurance salesman huckster in my approach. I am knowledgeable and friendly. I have no issue being on the shop floor. My ace is self deprecating humor. Despite what you read here, and what alternate opinion you may have formed about me, that is my true persona. I save my pent-up obnoxiousness for you. And my family.

I had an East Coast boss who hated my approach and constantly lectured me about changing the way I interact with customers, despite my continued success and territory growth. Many of those customers left with me when I went to a new company. That was also the same asshole who actually suggested I read from a script to customers. I laughed at him -- right to his face. He had issues that I did not take notes in meetings, until I recited back the entire conversation by rote to him in the car -- complete with volumes and part numbers. Of course he got the last laugh when he used the economic downturn after 9/11 to fire me. I quote -- "This department is going to make budget this year. The only way we can do it is by cutting salary. You are second in salary behind me, and I am not going anywhere. I have to let you go". One of my previous competitors hired me a week later.

Somehow we have drifted off topic, whatever that topic was.

What the Heck?

2011-12-21T08:33:00.000-05:00

It is the first day of winter. The temperature was FIFTY-FIVE degrees when I went to fetch the paper at 7:00 in the aye em.

What the fuck is up with that?

I am off in just a bit to finish up my Christmas shopping. Stay away from the mall today, I do not need you in my way. Thank you in advance for your help in this difficult matter.

Keep an eye on the place while I am mingling with the common people, OK?

Here is some entertainment for you. I am a giving person, eh wot?:

Things I know

2011-12-21T06:17:00.000-05:00

1. Peanut butter should always be of the smooth variety. Preferably Jif brand.

2. Honey should come from a bear-shaped bottle.

3. Just about anything makes a good sandwich when the bread is fresh.

4. Reading while eating improves digestion.

5. Had it been invented, all three Kings would have gifted Baby Jesus Chapstick. It is that awesome.

6. Next year I will not wait until the last minute to do my Christmas shopping.

It was a Brickhouse

2011-12-20T11:20:00.001-05:00

Today is my last day of work for the year. I am heading into vacation -- use it or lose it mode. I am pretty much caught up with work, so I took a break and fired up a nice cigar out in the garage. I looked at it kind of like a pre-holiday celebration. The cigar was good but the temps were in the low forties. I put on a couple of sweatshirts and my body was warm enough, but my hands got cold. I refuse to smoke a stogie in gloves. There are limits.

I enjoyed the relaxation, until I got too cold. i probably left a larger stub than I normally would.

I have grown into a huge wussy..

A touching tale of Christmas

2011-12-20T07:52:00.000-05:00

A couple was Christmas shopping at the mall on Christmas Eve and the mall was packed.

Walking through the mall the surprised wife looked up and noticed her husband was no where

around and she was very upset because they had a lot to do.

She used her cell phone to call her husband because she was so upset, to ask him where he was.

The husband in a calm voice said, "honey remember the jewelry store we went into 5 years ago

where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we could not afford and I told you that I

would get it for you one day".

His wife said crying, "yes I remember that jewelry store".

He said, "well I'm in the bar next to it."

Dear Indidanapolis Colts

2011-12-19T13:41:00.000-05:00

At this point it is clear it was my very presence in Lucas Oil Stadium that led to your first victory of the season yesterday. there can be no doubt upon this question.

I suggest you immediately provide me with a couple of tickets to all future home games in order to secure the guarantee of football victory going forward.

I do not expect expensive owners or corporate box privileges. Nor do I require 50 yard line views. Ninth row goal line seats similar to what I enjoyed yesterday will ensure your continued success and the blessings of the football gods for the remainder of this season and those to come.

Let me know if you need my mailing address to send the ducats.

Your Pal,

Joe

PS If you watched the game on TV, I was the one in the Colts jersey.

I want cupcakes

2011-12-19T06:57:00.000-05:00

My friend's daughter is in the third grade. My friend is a good mother and volunteered to be a room mother. She planned a ~~Christmas~~ Holiday party for the kids. My friend planned to bake cookies for the children and their party on the last day of class before ~~Christmas~~ Winter Break.

She got a call from the teacher the other day. My friend was told she could not bring cookies and not to plan anything for the party. The school principal sent a memo to all of the teachers that he will provide the treats for the various parties and the school will show an appropriate movie to all classes. His memo stated that it is "unfair" for some classes to have "better" treats and parties than other classrooms. The teacher said the principal explained to the teachers he does not want one class to have homemade cupcakes while another classroom merely gets a bag of Chips Ahoy. He claimed that was not "right" and he could not allow it.

This, my friends, is example 1,618 why the Nation is lost. We are raising generations of Americans with the idea they are promised not equal opportunity, but equal outcome. We see it in the youth soccer "no keeping score" mentality. We see it in the socialist bent to today's OWS "you owe me" attitude.

It does not matter who wins the next election. A Conservative wave could sweep the halls of Congress, The ghosts of Goldwater, Reagan, Jefferson and Madison could combine to inhabit the body of the next Republican President. The makeup of the Supreme Court could lurch to the political right of John Birch. The youth of America are growing up believing they are entitled. There is no understanding that life, liberty and happiness are earned, not given.Any roll back from creeping socialism is temporary at best. Mao and Lennin, and Hitler, and even John Dewey were right -- win the kids and win the political argument for all time.

Today Republicans and Democrats no longer argue if the Government should poke its filthy greasy fingers into the pie, but how many fingers are acceptable. They all agree we should tax the "rich" at a higher rate, the only argument is what that higher rate should be. Somehow we no longer debate if Progressive policies are viable or wise, only the degree of progressiveness.

Too many Americans believe that fair means taking from the have's and passing it to the have not as much. There is no understanding that any act of leveling means something has to be reduced and knocked down. As long as it is the other guy we don't care.

I have not ranted much about politics around here of late. I am resolved I will never hold my nose and vote for "Not As Bad As The Other Choice" ever again. Good people and not so good people are elected, head to the corruption of Washington and become the problem. There is no solution. Re-election is the only consideration. And why not? Does a pig back away from the trough when food remains? There is no political will to fix the immigration problem, the debt problem, the crush of an overwhelming bureaucracy. There will never be term-limits, it would mean the end of the power and money for too many career politicians.

Too is too much money and power at stake. We all know it. Only about 8 of every 100 Americans think our Congress does a good job. But fixing the problem means lost elections and an end to the gravy. Gotta keep gettin' the gravy.

But we do not demand better of our Nation. We look down at our plate of Oreos and are just pissed 'cause the other guy got homemade oatmeal scotchies.

p.s. My friend sent the cookies in the day before the party as a "treat" for the kids. Fuck you Mr. Commie Bastard Principal.

Today's Earworm -- Holiday Edition

2011-12-18T07:33:00.002-05:00

Weekend Funny

2011-12-17T06:00:00.000-05:00

A priest and a rabbi were sitting next to each other on an airplane.
After a while, the priest turned to the rabbi and asked,

'Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?'

The rabbi responded,

'Yes, that is still one of our laws.'

The priest then asked,

'Have you ever eaten pork?'

To which the rabbi replied,

'Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation and tasted a bacon sandwich.'

The priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading.

A while later, the rabbi spoke up and asked the priest,

'Father, is it still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?'

The priest replied,

'Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith.'

The rabbi then asked him,

'Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?'

The priest replied,

'Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke with my faith.'

The rabbi nodded understandingly and remained silent, thinking, for about five minutes.

Finally, the rabbi said,

'Beats the shit out of a bacon sandwich, doesn't it?

--got it from Otter

Going the full circle

2011-12-16T08:43:00.001-05:00

I was trying to decide on what brilliance I was going to share with you today. I read through my blogroll and the few other sites I visit every morning. I signed into the old Blogger dashboard to make sure I read all of my comments on various posts. I had no spam comments, a curious and unusual occurrence to be sure.

I wiggled my fingers over the keyboard. No letters or words poured forth onto the laptop screen.

I decided to put a load of towels into the washer. Harmless, impossible-to-screw-up-type laundry is all I am allowed to do. You know from which I speak -- towels, sheets, my tightie whities, the wife's unmentionables, the boy's stinky socks.

My work phone rang. Questions were followed by answers and goodbyes. I skipped over to the work email account to send follow ups to engineering.

I sipped my coffee. It was in a red spotted earthenware mug this morning. My Cubs coffee mug and my Superbowl XLIV mug were both in the dishwasher. The dishes were clean, but we have a hard and fast rule, if you open up the clean dishwasher you put away all of the dishes. No picking out a clean fork and leaving the dishes for someone else to put away. Don't worry, I will empty it later, probably at lunch time. The coffee was not tepid, it was cold.

I took a deep breath and began to type. "I was trying to decide what brilliance I was going to share with your today..."

Shotgun Blues

2011-12-15T09:20:00.000-05:00

Flying has never bothered me. Airports are a different matter. I guess when you have spent as many hours as I have in various airports you just think of them as the modern equivalent of you grandpa's bus stations.

Yesterday I trudged down the ramp at Charlotte to my gate in the C Concourse. I was a little early to the gate and passengers were just starting to board a flight to Charleston. As the gate area cleared I picked a spot to sit. The air around me stunk. It was bad body odor and it hung in the air like fog over London. I moved to another area and the odor lingered. It covered the entire boarding area and lingered for the hour and a half I waited to board my flight back to the Hoosier state. I am glad I was not next to that stinky passenger on the plane. I bet they had to fumigate the aircraft after landing. WTH, is the concept of bathing so foreign these days?

I love flying at night. From 39,000 feet you can see whole cities and counties at a glance. The lights look like splotches of orange and yellow paint splattered on black velvet. As we started our descent into Indy last night the scene was breathtaking. As I looked out the scratched and greasy window I wished I had the skills to describe what I saw.

The plane was flying just above a solid cloud bank. The rain filled clouds looked like a gray sea against the night sky. The plane seemed as if it were a ship sailing above a fluffy ocean. The clouds were literally right below our belly. We were skimming just above the upper surface of the clouds. .The plane banked left and the tip of the wing sliced into the clouds and disappeared from view, but the body of the plane remained just above the opaqueness.

As we started to descend into the clouds the plane seemed to speed up. I do not know why I always get that sensation when flying into clouds, there is no reference in the sky to help me sense speed, but it always feels as if we are accelerating.

We dropped from the low clouds just above the city. The tall buildings of downtown were to the south and east, just beyond my window, crouched in a huddled group around the hidden Soldiers and Sailors Monument.They seemed fewer and smaller from my vantage point in the winter sky.

The lights of the city spread below me. I marveled again that the city may lack in a lot of respects, but it is sure beautiful from the air. The grid of streets is bisected by the avenues running at angles from the Circle downtown. Orange lights line the streets.

As we came closer to the waiting arms of Mother Earth I began to see the signs and lights of stores and factories and shopping centers. Though I could not see them from the air, I noted again that Indianapolis has a remarkable number of trees within the city. In a winter night the trees are just voids in the winking lights below. Soon I could discern the cars on the roads and highways. I could just catch the twinkle of Christmas lights on a few decorated houses.

We sunk lower over the flat terrain and I could identify the Airport Expressway, or whatever it is called now. 465 was swept below as we crossed over the old terminal and parking lots and settled to a smooth landing. The FedEx building loomed bright and busy on the left.

The plane rolled westward toward the "new" terminal. I was home again, my last trip of the year.

Food as Art

2011-12-14T06:49:00.000-05:00

This is a shitty cell phone picture of the dessert I made yesterday morning for the wife to take to work for a pitch-in lunch. The pectin has not yet completely dissolved, by lunch it will be perfect.

They say life is a song

2011-12-13T13:30:00.000-05:00

If that is so, then today I am living a Peter, Paul, and Mary tune. Or maybe really a John Denver song

Question Number Nine

2011-12-13T08:54:00.002-05:00

Why is Eric Holder still in office?

Sadly, this is not a joke story from The Onion

2011-12-12T08:26:00.000-05:00

And right here, Ladies and Gentleman, in the center ring, we have example 1,694 of why the American people have no faith in the Government.

The United States has proposed opening an UNMANNED border crossing with Mexico. Mexican residents would scan an ID card before crossing. They will be able to communicate with a customs officer via speaker. The officer will be about 100 miles away. Here is the money quote:

"I think it's actually going to end up making security better," CBP spokesman William Brooks said.

Or perhaps it is this quote:

"We think we can do this without doing any damage to national security and possibly enhance security along the border by having better intelligence, better communication with people in Mexico."

Some Americans wonder why the cities and towns of the nation are plagued by ~~Illegal Immigrants, undocumented workers~~, fucking leaching criminals. The answer is simple. They are aided and abetted by the Federal Government.

Only a Federal bureaucrat, or probably any Democrat, would believe no security is better security.

I think I fell through the looking glass sometime in the last four years.

h/t Doug Ross

Divining rods: science or sorcery?

2011-12-11T08:17:00.001-05:00

Good morning Blog World.

I took the day off from the interwebz yesterday. Look at my hands -- no shakes. I am not sick to my stomach, I did not have the creeping terrors. I slept like a baby. I remain secure that this endeavor remains a hobby, not a habit.

We hit the mall yesterday, rather the wife hit the mall, I scored a comfy seat and watched the packages and sacks as she dropped them by. I think we are nearly done with the gift-shopping. I know the old bank account agrees. I am certain there are scorch marks on her debit card. I have to get a couple of things for the wife yet. Now a wrapping party seems to be in order so we can get this stuff out of my office and under the tree.

Wow, I have just read my efforts so far this morning. There is not a lot of substance. But it does cover up the last post. I have that going for me.

Friday I met a buddy at the cigar store. I bought a few smokes for my humidor and then sat in the lounge area and enjoyed a fine smoke. I had an H. Uppman Reserve Maduro (6 x 54). It was a big, long smoke. I don't usually smoke cigars that big around, but since it is getting too cold to sit outside and enjoy fine hand made cigars, it was all good. It was nice to sit and shoot the shit with a pal amid a whole store of aromatic burning leaves of tobacco. We failed to solve the world's problems, neither of us came up with a plan to make the Colts not suck. We discussed the realities of life on the road. Mostly we sat in the old barber chairs, and enjoyed the afternoon.

DO NOT read this post

2011-12-09T09:02:00.001-05:00

I think I just shit a garter snake.

A sticky black one that stinks like a sulfurous mix of old cabbage and rotten eggs.

Get over it already, Baltimore

2011-12-09T07:35:00.000-05:00

Dear Baltimore,

Get over it.

There was a football team in Baltimore called the "Colts" for 32 years. The franchise moved to Indianapolis in 1984. The circumstances of the move left many in Baltimore angry. The owner packed up the team and shipped it in moving vans in the dark of night.

Baltimore seems to forget that the city made it clear the Colts were not welcome. fans did not come to the games. If 50% of the supposed "die-hard" fans who "will never get over it" actually went to the games, the Colts would likely still be in Baltimore.

The city was making efforts to take the team from the owner through eminent domain. If a government entity was trying to take your business away, what would you do?

The Colts were in Baltimore for 32 years. They have now been in Indianapolis for 27. Maybe in six years the people of Baltimore will quit crying about the move. After all, they do currently have a very successful NFL franchise. Maybe they should support it?

Friday Covers -- Thursday Edition

2011-12-08T07:36:00.000-05:00

How about some gettin' in the mood music?

Judy Garland from "Meet me in St. Louis

Frank takes it for a spin

That is a more modern rendition from Christina Aguilera

And finally a cool new version from She and Him -- the 'she' being the hot and quirky Zoey Deschanel

A Date That Will Live in Infamy

2011-12-07T00:40:00.000-05:00

70 years ago today the Japanese launched their sneak attack upon Pearl Harbor in the US Territory of Hawaii. This action forced the United States into WWII.

There are entire forests of trees turned to paper written about Pearl Harbor. I have nothing to add. If you want to learn more I recommend you head to the library or your favorite bookstore and get a copy of Gordon Prange's epic history At Dawn We Slept.

I intend to watch Tora,Tora, Tora this evening.

Seventy years. For the youth of today WWII and Pearl Harbor are as remote as The Spanish American War was to my brother and I or the Civil War to our Grandparents. History stands still, time marches on.

My great-grandfather was a veteran of the Spanish-American War. He died before I was born, but my Grandmother was active in the Spanish-American War Auxiliary. She always wanted my brother and I to go with her to the National Conventions. I met some Span-Am Veterans, including some of the last ones alive. She wanted us to read at Veteran's Day Ceremonies. For a young me it was just a bunch of old people. I was too young to understand history is not in books, but rather people.

The people of WWII are dying fast. In a few years we will be reading stories of the last veteran passing away, just like the men of WWI or the Civil War. We are thirty-five years removed from Vietnam.

More died at Pearl Harbor than on 9/11. The national shock was just as severe, perhaps more so. The news of the day was print and radio, there were no live shots from CNNABCNBCCBS to keep the public informed. The horror arrived in pictures and newsreels.

Today will come and go, its passing just another mile marker on history's highway. The importance of the date dimmed by time. In another generation, WWII will be just more battles, another war, fodder for movies and stories. Pearl Harbor will just be a place mentioned in a history book like Waterloo or Trafalgar.

Pearl Harbor was the defining memory for an entire generation of Americans. Over the time of history it will become just like the speed bump in the grocery store parking lot. It will slowly shrink from memory until we barely notice it.

But for today, we will remember and honor those who gave their lives for Freedom. December 7, 1941. A date that will live in infamy.

Heavy digestion

2011-12-06T12:57:00.001-05:00

Heavy, ponderous stuff around here today.. I can hear you mumbling "Lighten up, Francis".

And since you asked, I had a fried Spam sammich -- with a bit of yellow mustard -- and some pickled beets. I washed it down with a Chery Coke Zero.

How about you?

Negotiating 101 -- the myth of the win-win

2011-12-06T08:22:00.001-05:00

I wrote a post earlier today that did not go the way I planned. Many of my posts are pre-written and scheduled to appear in the future. I know...it is like discovering the Great and Powerful Oz is just some pathetic little man behind the curtain...damn you Toto...

Anyway, I wrote a post earlier today that did not go the way I planned. I usually write free-form, letting the words flow from my fingers in a steady stream. I edit for spelling and the damn premature space bar thing after I am done. You may or may not be surprised to learn I rarely edit for content. I have written this way for 40 years. I let my brain compose and construct in the background and it just flows out in a steady, gurgling stream of raw sewage: untreated, unfiltered, sometimes unintelligible. You will have to judge the success of this method yourself.

I digress again. I wrote a post earlier today that did not go the way I planned. My thoughts took a different turn from my intentions. It was my plan to pen a piece that was upbeat, but the words took on a more somber and perhaps even maudlin tone as if by their own accord. It may be best to leave the post in "draft" form. I don't know. I am not sure I was able to convey the sense I was seeking. I confess I am not even sure what I was driving at myself.

Clio is a temperamental Muse. You would think otherwise. Music or Art are endeavors of creativity. But the ancients knew the recording of history was also an art. It is impossible to record everything, to know what happens today may be important later. What if that unrecorded random act later becomes a key milestone in the history of man? What if some rich sponsor took a shine to the immature art of a young painter named Adolph Hitler and young Adolph spent his days painting instead of talking politics in the beer hall?

What is history? That a young man crossed a shallow but swift river in Northern Italy one morning in 33 B.C. is not important. That another man crossed the same stream at the same place some fifteen minutes later changed the course of history. When Julius Caesar crossed the Rubicon it had a profound effect. Europe's geo-political boundaries, language and culture today are a result. That splash in the ocean of history sent waves through time that affect every part of the globe yet today.

On the other hand, some of us stick our finger into that same ocean and leave not even a ripple behind. It is left to each of us to remember, to pass on the stories of life, of family, of our own little history to future generations.

It is said that history is written by the victor. I say it written by those who remember.

Too bad it is a year too late

2011-12-05T13:14:00.001-05:00

Ron Santo finally elected to the baseball Hall of Fame.

Random Ramblings

2011-12-05T08:37:00.001-05:00

It is raining. Again. Still. Whatever. Flood ~~watches~~ warnings are out.

I made a pot of chili last night. Midwestern chili; soupy with macaroni in it. I picked out all of the beans. I hate beans. Except green beans, I will eat those. But not in my chili.

Artist rendering

I just put a load of towels in the washer.

My turds look just like chunks of anthracite coal this morning. I don't think that is natural, especially since it is my first dump in a week.

Too much information on a Monday?

Breaking News -- The Colts Suck.

Is it really possible there is not one single viable conservative candidate for President?

You have to get Governmental approval to drive a car or own a handgun. I am told the local animal shelter has to approve you before you can take a dog or cat home. But we allow any two people who decide to procreate to have a kid, even if the two of them could not spell GED with a dictionary in hand.

I guess I would not want it any other way.

Those parents who refuse to have their kids vaccinated -- you are beyond stupid. We should bring back quarantine for those families who get chicken pox or mumps or such if they refuse vaccinations. Not only does your idiotic refusal endanger your own kid, but society as a whole. For Chrissake Oprah is just a talk show host and actors and actresses are just people good at play acting and pretending. Being famous or infamous does not indicate intelligence. Playing a scientist in a movie does not make you a chemist.

A study of premarital sex frequency among public, private, and private-religeous educated high school students

2011-12-04T06:36:00.001-05:00

I have completed my daily wrestling match with the coffee filters. It went the distance and after a couple of escapes. a reversal, and one near-fall, I declare my self victor. I maintain I like my coffee double-filtered so you can just shut up about it.

There was a weird vibe in the air as I took my constitutional yesterday. I have a couple of routes I walk through the subdivision and I took the shortest. It is about 3-1/2 miles. It has been several days since I was able to walk due to travel and rain and ~~explosive diarrhea~~ and other issues we can't discuss because of a binding non-disclosure agreement.

Anyway I had my Christmas tunes playing in my earbuds as the bright sun made the low 40's temperature seem warmer than it was. I counted three houses being roofed and one crew replacing siding. You would have thought it was early summer, not just days before Christmas. I guess folks are spending their Holiday Cash on home improvements this year. Maybe the very heavy amounts of rain and wind we have experienced over the past month have exacerbated the situation and those old roofs need to be replaced. Much of the neighborhood is comprised of houses built in the1980s and early 1990s, so it is close to that time for roof replacements.

I guess I will sally forth into the interwebz this early Sunday morning to see what you have to say. It seems most people are posting a lot less frequently these days in this rapidly dying medium

A discussion of modern media and its effects upon an educated society

2011-12-03T09:38:00.001-05:00

I am in the middle of the third book in the Hunger Games trilogy. The books are very good. I am not usually much of a science fiction-type guy, but these have been very enjoyable. I am also in the midst of re-reading In God We Trust by Jean Shepherd. The iconic Holiday movie A Christmas Story (you know -- Ralphie) was based on a chapter in this collection of stories about growing up in Da Region (NW Indiana) in the Depression.

The Wife and I went to the dollar theater last night (it really costs $2.25) and saw The Help. I give it a hearty two thumbs up, even though it lacked all of the elements that make for a good movie -- no cars, no horses, no guns. There was not even any nekkid women breasties. In any case it was well worth the price of admission. Plus the popcorn was fresh!

Proof Positive

2011-12-02T09:51:00.001-05:00

There are letters and words right there on the computer screen. You can see them. I can see them. The letters and words have now turned into sentences and perhaps even a paragraph.

That makes this a post.

Of course he was from Ohio

2011-12-01T10:28:00.001-05:00

Dear jerk-off in the white Buick,

It is bad enough you were cruising in the left lane as trucks lined the right lane at the ridiculous lower speed limit. You drove on oblivious to the line of cars stretching behind you like a freight train. But it is not necessary to slam on your brakes because a policeman had a car pulled over on the OTHER side of I-65.

It is highly unlikely the policeman, who was standing next to the car he was ticketing, would catch you in the corner of his eye, determine you were going 1/8 of a mph over the speed limit, jump in his car, drive to the nearest crossover (there are barrier fences in this section) chase you down at a very high rate of speed -- remember you are going away from him at 70 and 1/8 mph - and cite you for speeding. Moreover, it was not necessary to brake to a hard FORTY-FIVE mph until the cop was out of sight. Since we were in North Central Indiana that means about three or four miles.

Moron.

'Cause it is F-ing Awesome

2011-11-30T06:28:00.000-05:00

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas

2011-11-29T14:21:00.001-05:00

It is currently snowing giant, ground covering flakes. It is a veritable blizzard -- the first significant snow of the season.

I can live with that.

So long

2011-11-29T06:45:00.000-05:00

Barney. The end cannot come soon enough. Mr. Frank you are a piece o'crap and your actions and votes are as responsible as any single persons for our current economic trouble.

Too bad you are sticking around even one more fucking day.

H20 No!

2011-11-28T09:46:00.001-05:00

This is where we are headed. The bureaucrats know everything. The Nanny State will decide, even if it defies common sense. It is people like this who want to control your healthcare. That idea sure makes me sleep better.

EU says drinking water does not prevent dehydration.

Come Sail Away With Me...

2011-11-28T07:59:00.001-05:00

(Photo by Andy Lyons/Getty Images)

This could possibly be the bright spot in a dismal Colts season.

Wadda ya want fer nuthin'?

2011-11-27T07:47:00.001-05:00

So sue me, I took a day off. The larger issue is did you even notice? Do you even care?

My first thought when I woke this morning was that it is Sunday. The long Holiday weekend is drawing to a close. I have lots of stuff to do yet before returning to work on the morrow. "On the morrow", have you ever heard a person outside of a costume drama actually use that phrase? I am not even sure why that particular combination of words sprang forth in my brain and through my fingers to the keyboard right out into the interwebz. But there it is clear in black pixels upon my white background.

Sports ain't life, but I watched a game yesterday where a coach sported a pair of balls the size of King Kong. Even through the fuzzy, jerky video on the website I was amazed. Little Wabash College in Central Indiana was playing the Cardinals of North Central in round 2 of the Division III football playoffs (imagine that a playoff system in college football). Wabash was down 21-0 at the half. The score was 28-7 midway through the third quarter. The season was on the brink. The school motto is 'Wabash always fights" and the team demonstrated it yesterday.

The little Giants (I know dumb nickname) battled back to score a touchdown with just under a minute to go in the game. the score was 28-27. Instead of playing for the tie and overtime, the Wabash coach went for two! Convert and win, fail and the season is over. Wabash went with a hard snap count, the Cardinals of North Central jumped offside. The ball moved closer to the end zone.

Even over the internet you could almost feel the tension in tiny Hollett Stadium. The ball was snapped, the pass sent to the far side of the end zone. The Wabash receiver leaped for the high pass, it tipped from his fingers, over the defender into the waiting arms of another Wabash receiver. He got two feet down and the men of Wabash had staged an unforgettable comeback.

It may be Division III and few of these young men will ever play football in the NFL, but there is still some fine football being played at small colleges and universities across the nation. Read more about the game here.

See it for yourself!

I am a living breathing Alka Seltzer commercial

2011-11-25T07:41:00.001-05:00

I had a great Thanksgiving and I am in a miserable happy place Yesterday I consumed two Thanksgiving dinners; way too much dessert and excessive carbs. Now the kitchen counter is filled with pie and the 'fridge with leftovers.

Wednesday was a long day. I woke early (5:30). I worked most of the day. I did a load of laundry. I put up the Christmas lights on the house. This involves several ladders and crawling around on the roof for a spell. The wife and I went out for a quick bite to eat. I came home and made Overnight Salad (some call it seven layer salad). I then made a pumpkin torte. While this is not hard, it requires several steps. I forgot the ingredients have to cool in between steps, so I did not finish until about 2:30 in the ay em. Part of the delay is my own fault. I forgot to get milk when I bought all of my ingredients. Lucky for me I had just enough left in the jug for my recipe. Until a little after midnight when the boy came out to the kitchen for a snack of cookies and milk. He finished what I had reserved for my torte! So off to the store I went to get a gallon of milk.I was not the only shopper grabbing Thanksgiving meal ingredients at 1:00 am.

Thursday morning I finished off the cooking by preparing Oreo Delight. Then we packed the car and headed off to the north central part of the Hoosier State to spend Thanksgiving with my family and later in the evening the Wife's family. We returned home just before midnight.

Today I have to finish the outside decorating -- put up the wreaths and string some lights in the cherry tree. Then I can begin to put up the trees in the house. Yes, I said trees. The wife loves her Christmas decorating.

On the bright side, I won't be anywhere near the shopping malls!

Have a great Friday.

Happy Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T01:48:00.000-05:00

One of my favorite songs from one of my favorite movies.

Here is the scene from the movie. Embedding was disabled.

Best wishes for a Happy Thanksgiving to you and your families.

Here we are

2011-11-23T13:16:00.000-05:00

Career politicians from both parties are more interested in winning the next election, or positioning their party to win the next election, than in really trying to solve our Nation's financial issues. The Debt Commission was the joke we all feared it would be.

Fuck the Democrats. Fuck the Republicans.

The truck is screaming down the mountain, the brakes are out, the tires are smoking. Our politicians are bitching the cigarette lighter won't work.

Right to Work

2011-11-23T06:58:00.000-05:00

Read This.

As Indiana again considers the "right to Work" issue, I think this article says all that is necessary.

Right versus Left

2011-11-22T08:20:00.001-05:00

There you have it. The entire political debate of our nation summed in one clip.

I have avoided politics for the past few weeks, much to either your delight, chagrin or indifference. But this clip demonstrates the divide between the Democrats and Republicans, Liberal and Conservative, whatever label you like, better than any I have seen in a while. Either you hear Newt and say "hell, yeah", or you listen to the blond and applaud. There is no way you can find a middle ground.

Me, there is no doubt where I stand. I am not much of a protester. I have said it before, assembling to complain and bitch without a solution is a waste of time. You can't get a job camping in a park. If you cannot find work, then volunteer. That experience will lead you to work. That one year gap on your resume where you list as experience "Occupying Wall Street" will not enhance your job prospects. Time spent working at the local soup kitchen or Habitat for Humanity will.

Look, the economy and job situation was not a lot better in the early 1980's when I graduated college. I spent a ton of money, had a mountain of student loans and a worthless Liberal Arts degree. Those were choices I made. My job prospects were few.

I took two part time jobs making $12,000 year -- combined.. I put in my time until I found a better job. That job required me to work 70-80 hours a week. I made about $20,000 per year for all of those hours. That was not much money even in 1988. I worked my ass off and learned valuable skills that have served me today. I parlayed that experience into a management position. I learned, adapted and took that experience into a better paying job.

Life is not fair. We all make bad decisions. I have made more than you cam imagine. You can whine and complain about the bad cards life has dealt you. That works for about a month. Then you suck it up and make the best of it. Camping out and bitching because the producers are not giving you the fruits of their work is not the answer.

Is there corruption in business, in Wall Street, in politics? Yes. Defecating in the streets, destroying public property, carrying signs, demanding free stuff does not bring about change.

Meditating could not raise the Pentagon during the Vietnam War and chanting won't pay off your student loans.

Take a walk on the mild side

2011-11-22T07:53:00.000-05:00

Monday

2011-11-21T08:20:00.001-05:00

I did not get my Christmas decorating done Saturday. All I planned on doing was the lights and when I pulled them out it was the usual tale. I need seven strings of 300 lights to do the house and an additional two strings for the cherry tree. Of the nine strings, only TWO worked. Some had just a few feet unlit, other more. Experience has taught me that even if I can get the shorted-out strings working, they will not last the season. I do not want to find myself on the roof in mid-December replacing a sting of lights here and there. The cheap Chinese electronics have become almost disposable after one season.

Since the Wife only likes the icicle lights from Target -- they are "shorter" than the ones from WalMart, we had to make a trip to the big city to get lights. That meant additional Christmas shopping as well. So Saturday was shot for decorating. It rained all day yesterday. According to the weather guy, Wednesday looks alright and Friday as well to do the decorating.

Since I refuse to go anywhere near the mall on Black Friday, it looks like I will be doing the decorating on Friday.

I find myself remarkably energetic and enthused about work today. Unfortunately the spirit is wasted. Thanksgiving week is the deadest of dead weeks, except maybe the week after Christmas, for those of us who toil in industrial sales. Customers are either on vacation or coasting through the week. I do have a conference call this afternoon, and I have some filing to do. I could always do my expenses. I think October is still unfinished...

Sinday

2011-11-20T06:45:00.000-05:00

Cool Stuff to peruse on a Sunday morning.

Here is an example:

U.S. General George S. Patton acknowledges the cheers of thousands during a parade through downtown Los Angeles, California, on June 9, 1945. Shortly thereafter, Patton returned to Germany and controversy, as he advocated the employment of ex-Nazis in administrative positions in Bavaria; he was relieved of command of the 3rd Army and died of injuries from a traffic accident in December, after his return home. Joe Rosenthal's famous Iwo Jima flag-raising photograph is visible on the war bonds billboard. (AP Photo)

3341

2011-11-19T07:57:00.001-05:00

The coffee is warm, not hot in my Superbowl XLIV mug. Bob Marley is crooning softly in the background as my iPod plays on the portable speakers. I just skimmed the paper this morning, and I have not spent a lot of time perusing your blogs.

It is supposed to be a tad warmer this afternoon, albeit windy. I think I will try to get the Christmas lights up on the house today. They will not be turned on until Friday, though. I could wait until next weekend, but who knows what Mother Nature has in store. It could be freezing cold or raining. I would rather work in fifty degree temps and a little wind than hope for the best next Friday.

Monte Hall would hate me as a contestant on Let's Make a Deal.

Friday Five

2011-11-18T08:27:00.001-05:00

I love movies. New movies, old movies, I don't care. I love to get lost for an hour or two in a fantasy world of celluloid. I love Technicolor or black and white films. I spend most of my TV time watching movies. The wife and I have really one one thing in common -- we both like going to the movies.

As such, I am pretty sure I can identify five elements that make a good and enjoyable movie. I am not talking about the stuff the critics like, but rather the elements that make you want to watch and enjoy a film. Inclusion of one or more of these elements does not necessarily make the movie good, but the absence of these elements virtually guarantees the movie will suck. In no particular order:

1. Cars. A film needs cars -- fast cars or car crashes, or car chases. The Blues Brothers mall scene is worth the price of admission (or to buy the DVD). Bullitt was a so-so movie except for the car chase. Hell, Rat Patrol is a TV show that was worth viewing just for the Jeeps in the opening credits.

2. Horses Horses make for good movies. Seabiscuit and Secretariat had horses. So do most John Wayne and Clint Eastwood westerns.. Red Dawn had horses for a couple of scenes. Just because a horse is present does not mean the movie is good -- see National Velvet (no, don't and take my word for it).

3. Guns Sergent York, Dirty Harry, Outlaw Josey Wales, True Grit, High Noon, Full Metal Jacket, Big Jake, any gangster movie, Bonnie and Clyde, The Godfather, Master and Commander, Zulu Dawn, James Bond...'nuf said.

4. Karate/fights/chicks in swimsuits/sports. Bruce Lee, Esther Williams, Frankie and Annette films, James Bond, Blood Sport, Hoosiers, Rudy, Field of Dreams, Billy Jack are all examples.

5. Starring Clint Eastwood, John Wayne, Fred Astaire, Steve McQueen, Frank Sinatra, Esther Williams, Audry Hepburn, Sean Connery, John Belushi, Paul Newman, Jimmy Stewart, or Kevin Costner (but only if it is a sports movie).

Your opinion may vary, but is likely wrong if you disagree.

Yes, it is

2011-11-17T12:25:00.001-05:00

A little bit of nothing

2011-11-16T13:24:00.001-05:00

I went for a walk at lunch time. The north wind was blowing a cold breeze. One could almost feel the temperature drop while treading the sidewalkless streets of my neighborhood. I click my iPhone over to the Pandora app and listened to some Christmas music to get me into the mood.

It looks like we may have an OK weekend, weather-wise. If so, I will endeavor to get the Christmas decorations and lights up. They will not be turned on until after Thanksgiving. Some rules are inviolate.

I cooked a turkey and dressing TV Dinner in the microwave upon my return.

We are getting to the slow time of the year. Orders are steady, but the purchasing and engineering contacts I call upon are busy winding down for the holidays. I have a hard time making appointments between Thanksgiving and the early part of January. That means more office time and less windshield and hotel time.

It is hump day, I hope your day is going well.

Friday Covers -- Wednesday edition

2011-11-16T07:13:00.000-05:00

Here is a song you probably do not know:

That cover is by Yes from their Time and a Word LP.

Here is te original penned by Stephen Stills as performed by Buffalo Springfield

The Douchebag in the Dairy Aisle

2011-11-15T11:54:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago I changed the alert sound my phone makes when I receive a text message. The previous tone was the same as my wife and ten million other people, so I was often confused. The wife would get a text and I would get up from my recliner and look at my phone. I changed the sound to a little whistle. Not a wolf whistle, but a "hey" kind of whistle.

I don't know why. The "why". is not important to this story. It just is the tone I am using. Pay attention.

So, I am at my friendly Kroger Sunday afternoon buying groceries (what a concept). I stood behind a woman at the dairy section blocking up the cheese selection. I waited politely and even sighed to let her know she could move her fat ass and cart -- to no avail. It was about then my daughter sent me a text: whooo-weet. That little whistle got me a dirty look. Offended, she made her selection and moved out of my way.

I got her attention, even if it was unintentional.

Living below average

2011-11-15T08:22:00.001-05:00

Last week at our annual sales meeting we went bowling. It was a "team building" exercise. There was food and beer and bowling. I have always sucked at bowling. I realized by the fifth frame of the first game I still suck at it.

I bet it has been at least five years since I was last in a bowling alley. I am reasonably sure I have not bowled without "bumpers" for at least 20 years. The final score -- 106/109/91. I was not the worst player at the alley that night, but I was no way shape or form one of the better bowlers.

I guess it is my lot in life the round out the bottom half of any statistic.

On the road to self-improvement

2011-11-14T08:38:00.000-05:00

I have developed a bad attitude recently. Too much negativity is squashing my natural sense of humor and moral superiority.

I am pretty sure I just need to find an abandoned warehouse and dance out my anger and frustration.

Little Giants win -- Dannies swallow

2011-11-13T07:43:00.000-05:00

I had another post written for this morning. After reading it again, I realized it was not as funny as I thought it was yesterday morning. I will let it stew over in the draft category a few days and see if the post is like wine -- it get better with time. I do not have high hopes.

We went to see the oldest boy and his band play Friday night. The show was pretty good. If I can determine how to move video from my iPhone to the 'puter, I will post some examples.

Yesterday after walking the neighborhood I raked the leaves in the front yard. I need a new rake. The one we have is more than 25 years old. I think I paid a few bucks for it from Big Lots. The head is held on by a finishing nail. It is missing more than one tine. On the plus side, if I was to purchase another rake -- we would have two and certain people could help rake the damn leaves.

Livin' Large

2011-11-12T07:12:00.002-05:00

I was on the 10:15 out of White Plains (Westchestah County) with a 1:55 connection home from Philly. I got to the airport about 6:45 in the ay em, 'cause that is when my ride had to be there. The bank of fog obscuring the runway was a bad omen.

Shortly after 7:00 the airline called and told me my flight was cancelled. Not delayed. It just was not going to happen at all. I went to the counter for new flights. The nice lady rebooked me on an earlier flight for Philly slated to leave at 8:00. These new arrangements would help me make an earlier connection home. I would be back to God's country by mid afternoon instead of supper time. The whole situation was a good deal for this frequent traveller.

The flight was delayed until 8:30. then 9:00. I had missed my connection. The line at the counter stretched about 20 people deep now. It was not moving. I had my travel agent rebook me back on the 1:55 from Philly to Indy. A new departure was announced for 10:15. They hoped to have an update by 10:30. They finally boarded us at 11:10..

We pulled from the gate. There was a ground hold in Philly. We sat on our little Dash-8 waiting for the clearance that came around noon. My 1:55 connection was going to be tight. Except I knew that if the flights into Philly were running that late, the odds were good those flights leaving the City of Brotherly Love were off schedule too.

I love being right except when being right causes me to spend even more time in an airport. My 1:55 was delayed to 3:41. Then the 3:41 was moved to 4:41. This was followed by additional delays to 5:39. We finally boarded about ten minutes late to the revised schedule.

We then sat in the plane waiting on a crew that needed to deadhead to Indy. This means they were not working the flight, the crew just needed a ride. The Pilot said this errant crew was scheduled to LAND in a few minutes. An hour later we finally pushed back from the gate.

When I turned my phone on after landing in Indy I had a message from the airline. It informed me my 1:55 flight was delayed.

I got home around 10:00 in the pee em.

People are always telling me they think I have a great job. They tell me it must be fun to travel all over, staying in hotels, flying the friendly skies.